Connecting is easier when you develop empathy

If you feel like you are pining for a deeper connection with your spouse, kids, parents, and friends, connecting with God and your own heart is the best first step. The wild paradox is that you can choose to “feel understood” before you start to “understand” your loved ones. When you feel understood apart from those around you, you aren’t as needy, and you’re more likely to be empathetic to those around you.

If you have ever felt like one person is doing all the giving and receiving nothing in exchange, it’s natural to feel the injustice and move towards feeling misunderstood. At this point, it’s nearly impossible to develop empathy. Yet, most relationships fail not because of a lack of understanding (as most psychologists make us believe), rather it is due to the deficiency of adequate empathy (emotional connection) between our family and friends.  

Empathy takes you to a level of vulnerability which you normally won’t have, understanding makes you accept issues mostly based on facts, without proper immersion into the person’s situation (emotions). Understanding is necessary for two people to meet and be together, but empathy is necessary for love and a true connection between family and friends.  

Making it a goal to become a genius at empathy, is a journey of love. The fruit of respect and honor in a relationship is freedom, which isn’t the absence of commitments, but the ability to choose - and commit yourself to - what is most loving for all persons involved. Give your family your firsts! Your first smile of the day, your first conversation, the first one to hear your good news, and the first one you reach out to when you’re feeling vulnerable. Giving your loved ones the gift of empathy, respect and honor are building a life that is rich in unconditional love.

Hear more about this topic on Episode 113 of All About Relationships Podcast with Bob and Audrey.